September 2006 – Coffee, Covers, Gurus & New Website

Monthly Motivational Quote

Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice.
It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.

-William Jennings Bryan

Hey Guys,

So here I am finally in my new place in Putnam Valley…the first Capo update to go out from this remote location. When the movers moved me up here they said, “Hey lady who you escaping from?” With a name like Capo they thought I was in the witness protection program. Anyway loving it up here, as always just want to give you guys a quick update of what this city girl gone country is now doing.

1) A 200 Mile BBQ – Fran’s hosts labor day party in the woods without power
2) Rented Howard Beach apartment with a cool marketing twist
3) Fran asked to be a Guru from comedy to canyons on
4) Anthony Robbins, Wayne Dwyer and now Fran Capo as self growth experts.
4) New Website design leads Fran to stand on a table in front of Chamber of Commerce
5) Fran Judges Chock Full of Nuts Fast talking New Yorker contest in Madison Square Garden – Sept 20th- Gives $3,000 prize.
6) Nothing is Impossible Tour for kids help fund school in Africa
7) Fran on cover of Pulse Magazine
8) Still doing weekly blog for WB called Fran’s World at
Pictures are on the blog. (Commercials)
9) COMEDY appearance dates
10) Movie recommendation: The Illusionist.

1) A 200 Mile BBQ – Fran’s hosts labor day party in the woods without power
So I figured if I moved in one week, why not have a party the next week…invite a bunch of my friends and family so I can have love fill the new place…Well wouldn’t you know it…we had a thunder storm the night before the party (while my mom, sister and niece were over)…had to do an emergency run to home depot for flashlights…but wait it gets better…I find out since I’m in the country…if the lights don’t work…neither does the toilet (pumped up well water) …yeah…this was going to be some party.

Here’s the whole story as listed on my blog, complete with pictures of me running out the lake at midnight to get the water….

It all started when I decided the best way to Christen my new home was with a Labor Day bash. Seeing as this was a big move for me_city girl goes country,
moving away from mom, living in the woods, breaking up with my fiancÄe_I wanted to have my loved ones around the first week I was in. Seemed simple enough.

Well as with all things in life you have to roll with the punches. I planned the party for Saturday afternoon at two. Email invitations went out_and 25 of my friends and family were going to attend. Everyone offered to bring something, and in addition I had bought a badminton set, volleyball and some horseshoes so we could have some activities to play as the hamburgers rolled around in our stomachs.

Then hurricane Ernesto decided to come coasting in_making Saturday look more like a pool party than a BBQ bash. So I decided to switch the party to Sunday. Since some friends had prior commitments and my own family couldn’t make it on Sunday because my niece had a gymnastic meet_ I decided to have the party in shifts_family stay from Friday to Saturday_friends come on Sunday.

On Friday, I drove to Queens, gathered up the Capo troops which consisted of my sister, Sharon (who always packs as if she is going away to Egypt), my niece, Athena (who brought her entire stuffed animal collection) and my mom, Rose, who always buys an assortment of necessary household items for me on every outing_(tissues, toilet paper etc.). With practically a U-haul in tow we headed due north to my place.

We arrived at my country abode around 7 PM. My sister inspected the place and gave it the thumbs up. Mom was happy to be out of the city and Athena found a new found playmate in Isabelle, my downstairs neighbor’s daughter, who share this country house with me. We invited Wanda, the mother and her other two kids up. We all had dinner, the kids played, the adults talked. At midnight we decided to turn in, but not before my sister, decided she wanted to go outside in the back to see how it would feel. She opened the door, saw the pitch-blackness, slammed the door and said, “Okay, too scary.” Then we hear Athena scream. ” Ah_Spider!” I laughed, “Welcome to the country guys. “
I felt like a big shot being there a whole week, like I was used to this way of life, I mean after all, I had survived the raccoons getting into my garbage, a horde of knats bullying the way into my kitchen, and crickets screaming louder than a rock concert. Little did I know this was only the introduction.

The next morning everything was still fine. I saw a baby deer on my lawn with a little bunny rabbit and thought_”Oh wow, my own rendition of Bambi. Where’s Walt?”

(Jpeg #2 – Baby deer on lawn with rabbit)

My friend, Dale came by with more party’ supplies; like a tent, coolers, garbage bags and his home made key lime pie. (Yes the guy bakes too). Around noon it started to rain, the clouds became overcast, we did some quick last minute shopping, built a file cabinet and then Ernesto decided to ring the doorbell.

(Jpeg#3 – building a filing cabinet)

At 6 p.m. my fantasy of country living changed. Wanda came upstairs and said, “I’m heading out to my friends_just wanted you to know I saw a downed tree on the street above us_looks like some electrical wires are down. That street is closed. My friend said she lost power”.
“How far is your friend from us?” I asked.
“Just up the hill. Good thing we didn’t lose power. Takes a few hours to come back on, the worst was a week in the dead of winter.” My eyes bulged out like a cartoon character.
“What! Okay well, at that point I head back to Queens. ” Then I said to myself, “Capo get a grip, you’ve walked on hot coals for goodness sake_you can handle a power outage in the country. It would be an adventure. “Wanda said goodbye and drove off.

Then as if God decided this would be a nice little test_the lights flickered, went back on, and then everything went black.”
“You have got to be kidding me!” I said. I got out the candles and the Capo clan and Dale sat around the table and did the most sensible thing we could think of, we played Chinese Checkers by candlelight.

When the ancient Chinese game didn’t conjure up any special power and the lights still didn’t come back on, we decided it best to head to Home Depot and get some heavy duty welcome-to-the-country flashlights. It was windy and the rain was coming down steady, which added to this whole adventure.

Back home with flashlights in hand, we decided to check the extent of the damage around our area. Dale and I decided to walk up the dark country roads. Bats swooped down feasting on the poor bugs that were dumb enough to stay in the spotlight. I loved it. Still would rather have the lights, but loved it just the same.

As we continued to dodge bats, we noticed lights in some of the windows and judged most to be candle lights_but then, as if finding gold in a sea of dirt, we spotted some real electric lights just up the road – wasn’t sure if it was a generator_but thought that maybe the lights were working their way back through the grid.

Confident we headed back to my house. It was then that Wanda gave us the bad news_”I just called the electric company. 22,000 homes in Putnam are without lights_won’t be back on till Midnight on Monday.”
“Oh man. Good thing the BBQ is in the daytime. If I get bags of ice I can at least keep the food in the fridge cold till be cook em.”
“Yeah, that will work. I’d just be concerned about the bathroom.”
“Why? We’re not cooking in the bathroom.”
“Girl, we’re in the country. The toilets run on well water. Which means the electric pumps it up to the toilet tanks.”
“What! So no lights equal no toilets! That’s it. I want to go back to Queens now. To hell with Bambi.”
At this point, Spencer called my ex, Steve and told him what was happening. Steve offered to host the party at his house (which was the house I just moved out of a week ago because we broke up!) It was a nice gesture, but felt a little weird, so I said I’d stick it out.
We had to come up with a plan fast. It was now midnight…(go to hit the blog link) to read the rest of the story.

2) Rented Howard Beach apartment with a cool marketing twist
So you guys know from getting my emails that at first I was going to buy a foreclosure the try to buy a handy man special, then decided on renting up here in Putnam. I’ve also been trying to rent my Howard Beach apartment. Had 3 realtors, sent out a mass email to friends, put an ad on,, and and only got a few bites. Was told the market was very slow, and ever other story’ll rent it better in a few months. I was asking $1500 for a 3 bedroom apartment, the going rate…Then I had enough.

I went into my complete Capo mode. “That’s it. I’m renting this apartment THIS week. I just have to figure how. I have to be creative.” Sooo, I remember reading in my good friend, real estate mogul Barbara Cochoron’ s book, that she had to do something different and create a buzz when she was trying to sell some real estate. So I decided…okay, create a buzz…mmm it’s labor day…YES! Why not hold a labor day sale on my apartment. They have every other kind of sale, so why not an apartment sale. So I put out an ad on Craig’s list.

3 Bedroom – Queens, NY
plus utlities

If you are looking for a comfortable apartment with great landlords, close to all shopping, and travel then this is the place for you.

(Then I listed all the details…down to the shopping areas etc. )
I got 10 calls the next day…It is now rented to a wonderful teacher named Aarron, and his family. He is a transplant from Washington state, and now teaches just 10 minutes away from where I live in Howard Beach! We are thrilled…once again if you decide to do something and you act in a creative can get done, despite what the experts say.

3) Fran asked to be a Guru from comedy to canyons on
So there I was minding my own business when I got asked if I would want to write a celebrity travel column with tips on the grand canyon. Since the grand Canyon is one of my chapters in my Adrenaline Adventures book, I figured why not.

Below is the article/tips link (if you are thinking of traveling there ever you might want to check it out:)
If you scroll down..they have me as their “celebrity guru”- pretty cool.

But it gets better. While I’m on their site, I see that they have columns about comedy. I offered to write a column and got my second column from them.
So for any of you aspiring comics…there are a few pointers from the school of hard knocks.

4) Anthony Robbins, Wayne Dwyer and now Fran Capo as self growth experts.
I’ve been asked to include information about my motivational speaking on a site about self growth…I was honored when I found out the company I will be keeping. The info is in, and we are waiting for the page to be announced….and of course you realize that even though I’m a comic…we are not talking about self growth that happens after you down a pint of yahoo and a case of twinkies. 🙂

5) New Website design leads Fran to stand on a table in front of Chamber of Commerce
Well I figured if I am going to be moving physically, maybe it’s time to redesign my cyberspace area as well. Okay, actually it didn’t happen just that way…here’s the deal.
I was doing a talk out in Connecticut called, “Creativity in Marketing” a few months ago. I meet this bubbly girl named Donna (the women rides horses, teaches skiing, and has a fast talking daughter.) So she approaches me and tells me that she thinks we have a lot in common. A few days later I get an email from her saying that her company, would like to redesign my website…and if I like the job done would I be willing to tell my friends about it. Sounds like a good deal. But now of course I have an inner conflict…my son, Spencer also designs websites.

I meet with Donna we hit it off. I tell Spencer he feels betrayed. I’m feeling Oh Vey (and I’m not even Jewish). I talk to Spencer about it. I tell him the changes I need done…after all, he has designed other comics websites and done a great job…BUT after we talk…I notice he is saying…”Mom…you need to leave the business part to me. ” I realize that even though he is my son, and is fantastic at what he does, I’m still as a mom, going to try to pull rank and maybe even ask for midnight changes, plus he talks to me differently than he does his other clients….mmmmm.” Maybe becasue I tell him to clean his desk up as he is doing a change for me…. Soooooo I decide…you know it’s best if I keep this part of my business separate. I can promote both and I tell Intelihosts that up front. They are cool with it, after all they have kids they are proud of as well.

Then we go into a whirlwind change of my site. You see they are experts at turning sites around or building them in 10 days. They also have a feature where once they get my site in order…I can go in and make those midnight changes myself. It’s called, Smart CMX. I saw it demonstrated and it looks simple enough, even for this girl who still uses a 35mm camera and fax with thermal paper.

So anyway, the bottom line is…my new website… will be released this week…right in the midst of my media tour…(Hey timing is everything…so hopefully the world will see what a great job, has done.)

Check it out on Wednesday, Sept. 20th…and let me know what you think!
,I even have video’s up there of my acting etc.
Easier navigation… easier to buy my books (hey you know us authors)…and some added photos of things I’ve done.

(Oh and as far as the getting up on the table is concerned…. I spoke at the Connecticut Chamber of Commerce…an event hosted by to announce the launch of their Smart CMX. I was their speaker. The woman in charge says, “I apologize in advance, this group sometimes doesn’t listen to the speakers.” I’m thinking….”Oh no…that’s not gonna happen here.”
So when it’s time to speak, I ask everyone who is standing at the far end of the room (and I’m talking football field far) to mozy on over to the other side of he room and listen to the speaker(which is me.) I tell them I’m from New York, and if I have to I’ll be happy to smack some people.” They laugh and move on over.

Then since there is no stage (after all it’s a networking convention, not a lecture hall) as I’m announced by Donna, I decide that I’m too short to be seen by a crowd who is standing. So I ask Bill (one of the webdesigners) to move a table over to the microphone._
He does. I climb on it. Very lady like, but hey I’m an adventurer not a ballet dancer.
The people laugh, and then I do my spiel about who I am, my new website, the titanic etc. I even offer to sell books if they are interested…told them I had them in the trunk of my car. To my amazement…I sold a bunch of books. They also turned out to be a great audience, ( I even got an offer of a date from a race car driver!) I might even get some speaking engagements out of it…and intelihosts will get some clients….So all is well in the new web design world. Maybe I’ll see you on the track….anyway
,Check it out…

5) Fran Judges Chock Full of Nuts Fast talking New Yorker contest in Madison Square Garden – Sept 20th. – Gives $3000 prize
Well you all know by now that I do spokesperson work.

I am now the judge of the Chock Full of Nuts search for the fasting talking New York Resident contest, so all you New Yorkers…come on down.

Here’s are the details:

Date: This Wednesday, Sept. 20th

Where: NYC, Madison Square Garden Mall (in front of the box office)
7th Avenue between 31st and 33rd

Time: 7:00 – 8:30 final talk off time.

What you have to do:
Say the Chock full of nuts jingle as many times as you can in a New York minute.

What will you be judged on:
Clarity, speed and passion.(33% each)
If you miss a word, that jingle doesn’t count.

Prize: $3000 and year supply of Chock full of Nuts to the winner.
Runner’s up get $200.

What do you get for entering?:
Some media exposure and a free cup of coffee from a ghostbuster pack…
And I get to see you 🙂

Must be over 18 to enter.
Oh yeah, and for the day at the cafes,…the cappichiono is named, Capo cappochino 🙂

6) Nothing is Impossible Tour for kids help fund school in Africa
So if you want to see my latest adventure/sponsorship opportunity go to my webpage at

Basically…I hooked up with a publisher, Kiwi The owner, Eitan…also climbed Kilimanjaro (You see there are many nuts like me out there) …anyway Eitan added the picture of me doing my booksigning at the top of kilimanjaro to the greeting card pack (10 in a pack). The proceeds go to helping a school in Africa…so where does Nothing Impossible Tour come in?
,You have to read it to find out…but it has to do with any company that wants to get their product in front of kids (like Apple computers does). The company would sponsor my humorous yet educational stories to the kids, filled with my message that they can accomplish any dream they go after.

The company sponsors my message to the kids and gets a new audience, the kids get energized and motivated to go for their goals, and the school in Africa gets money as well…it’s all tied in. Press the sponsorship key on my website.

7) Fran on cover of Pulse Magazine
So I get booked as a headliner in a comedy club in Bath, PA for a “All Girls Night Out” comedy show. I accept the gig while I’m in a rush. I get call that a reporter from Pulse Magazine wants to do a story on me and my upcoming comedy gig. I talk to the reporter for an hour, we have a great time…laugh and she says she’ll come to the show.

I finally look at a map the night before the gig…The gig is FAR. I have vacationed closer.
I think about cancelling, but think that’s not the professional thing to do.
I leave at 6, the show is at 9. I figure that’s plenty of time.
Turns out the gig is 179 miles from my house…one way!
I’m passing cows and other farm animals. My cell phone has no reception.
I’m thinking I might sleep in the pasture.
I’m an hour late to the show.
I call the club when I get to the one square block of reception…they say not to worry.
I get there…there is barely a crowd, apparently there was some problem in the back with bikers and parking…nice neighborhood. It’s one block long and the club looks more like a saloon in an old western movie.
I’m out of gas, I fill up at the one gas station in town, just in case I have to make a quick get away. Plus my car doesn’t run on cow dung…so I figure may hay while the moon shines.
I walk in the club in combat comedy mode.
A singer is on. What?
The audience is her family and some ex-bikers.
I think I should leave. Then I see my face as big as ever on the cover of the Pulse Magazine. I smile…wow, a silver lining in a twilight zone show.
,I take 20 copies of the magazine. I take peoples beer can’s off my nose and take their magazines as well.
When I finally go onstage I hear a rumble outside.
I realize my car is parked in a tow away zone.
I tell the audience I believe my car is getting towed. They laugh. I stand up on a chair and look out the window. I’m fine. It’s just the cops having a good time.
I leave with press in hand.
I send copies to my mother and say…”I paid my dues for that one.”
She is happy and puts it in her scrap book.

8) Still doing weekly blog for WB called Fran’s World at (Commercials )
Okay you guys know I am more than just a fast talker….here’s what else I do in my spare time. If you want to know what it’s like to shoot a tv show…you’ll find this of interest.
The complete story is at the blog with pictures (

Behind the TV SCENES
Fran’s World…

Someone asked me the other day what it was like doing a taping of a TV show. Now nearly 250 TV shows later, I still remember the excitement I felt when I did my first show, which happened to be the Joe Franklin Show. In case you haven’t heard of him, he’s in the Guinness Book of World Records for having the longest running talk show_ I think his first set was in Lincoln’s log Cabin _yeah well, you get the point.
Anyway, I remember I brought my mom with me because I was so nervous. I was on promoting my product, the “Pet Fleas”; tiny little stuffed fleas that came with a care book, and a tiny matchbox home. I would sell them at flea markets.
I remember that Jackie Mason was on the show with me and the first comment he made to Joe Franklin was that everyone in the opening montage was dead_”What is this_ a show for dead people.” he said.
Then afterwards he asked my mom if he could take me out on a date. Although I like his humor_he was old enough to be my father, and he wasn’t exactly my type, so I turned him down_his secretary later called my house and told me I was making a big mistake. Such is life.
Anyway, for those of you who have never been to a taping of a TV show, I thought you might find it interesting to know what goes on behind the scenes when you get asked to be a guest.
Lets cut to the chase and say they know about your talents (in my case they are usually interested in my fast-talking) and they want you to come on the show to do a segment. They usually have a theme in mind, or a plan set up already (like with me playing a prank on Martha Stewart on April Fools day).
So the first thing that happens is the segment producer will call, introduce themselves, ask you if you’d like to be on the show and tell you what they have in mind. Once you say you are available, they will begin to interview you by asking you a bunch of questions….

(read the rest at Click on the blog button on the left.

Date: Sat. Sept. 23- Comedy Cabaret in Cherry Hill, NJ
Showtime: 9 PM
Club phone number: 856-866-JOKE

Date: Sat. Sept 30th – Comedy Cabaret in Doylestown, PA (Bucks County)
Showtime: 9:30 (smoke free room)
Club phone number: 215-345-JOKE

Date: Fri & Sat. October 6 & 7
Showtimes: Friday and Sat. 9:30 (Sat. smoke free)
Club Phone Number: 215 676-Joke

(ALSO APPEARING ON NBC – 10! with live Studio audience

Check out for directions
10) Movie Recommendation: The Illusionist.
If you are up for a good love story, that’s not a chick flick, but has a nice twist at the end, and good acting…check this movie out.

That’s it.
Gotta get back to chasing the raccoons out of my garbage.
Fran Capo signing off till next time….remember to
Create a great day!

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